Does a family bed not spoil the child? – Many parents report that their baby does not want to sleep in their bed and cries there. And just as many are stressed out because they think the baby should not sleep in the parents’ bed. They think the child has to get out of there and fear to pamper.
A family bed does not promote the occurrence of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
You may think of family bed recommendations for sudden infant death syndrome, which strongly recommend sleeping babies in their bed in the master bedroom. A family bed is safe if you follow some safety instructions. Incidentally, in societies (South America, India) where sleeping with children in bed is normal, the phenomenon of sudden infant death syndrome is unknown.
Experience has shown that babies rarely adhere to guidelines about where to sleep, and they demand that they sleep with their parents. Guidelines are quickly passed in practice on the part of the parents because of course, you do not want to let your baby cry. This is also completely fine because here the maternal primal instincts come to light.
In addition, in addition to your baby lying in the family bed, so a place to sleep for all family members, you can perceive any respite in your baby much better and faster. Also, breastfeeding is much easier because you do not have to leave the bed. Also, if you feed your baby with the vial, you can already prepare everything in the evening and stay in bed at night to satisfy your little one’s hunger.
There must be hooks !?
Do not hesitate, but concerns are held up at every turn. Again and again, Frevel sounds against the family bed – some answers:
- “You’ll never get that kid out of your bed again.” – It’ll be out for Abi. Certainly.
Seriously, it is right that the children will sleep longer together. But you do not feel directly per se as disadvantageous.
At some point, the child will decide by itself to leave the parent’s bed. Of course, before this time, arrangements in the family are possible, whether changes in the sleeping situation should take place. Each family member has needs and desires that need to be combined. However, the removal of the child is usually not expected before the second to third year of life.
- “You spoil your child too much.” – Meeting basic needs such as being close to one another is not indulging. No way.
- “You will not have a sexual life anymore.” – Sex is not confined to beds.
- “You’re crushing the baby.” – You definitely will not. Parents do not intuitively lie down on their child. Or have you accidentally rolled on your partner in your sleep?
Restriction: When taking alcohol or drugs, please do not take the baby to bed as this intuition is clouded. Also essential is the smoke-free sleep environment!
Is there also the golden mean?
There is a middle ground for everything. Because every family is different and there is an individual solution for each one. Forcing one way or the other is usually not a good idea.
An interim solution, for example, is to install a cot on one side only and use it as a balcony where your child can sleep close to you but has their mattress. Or an enlarged, additional bed. For example, this is convenient for small couples or simply because you want to do it that way.
How does a family bed “go” in practice?
The easiest option is to simply take your baby to the parent’s bed and let it sleep next to you. Since it should also be possible for you and your partner to be close to each other, it is best not to let your baby sleep in the middle. So that it can not fall out on your side, you can push your bed against a wall.
If you prefer to use the baby mentioned above balcony method, mount it on one side and push the open side to your bed. Optionally, angles for attachment may help, and tailored foam fill the gap. Some parents also build their family bed with a very large lying area (e.g., 2x90cm plus 1×1.40m) or dismantle the bedstead to have a large mattress storage.
Whatever you do, find your family bed and make yourself comfortable. Because in addition to all the good for your baby you need a restful sleep with plenty of room.
Midwife & mother
- A family bed does not promote the occurrence of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
- Basic needs such as satisfying proximity to each other are not indulging. No way.
- A family bed is good for most people and can alleviate the supposed sleep problems.
- It’s the natural way to have your baby close to you and your family